But maybe you haven’t fully bought into that thinking. After all, you have amazing products and an awesome comp plan.
But your friend could join someone else who has an amazing product and awesome comp plan unless you invite them to join you. You probably have already experienced the disappointment of losing your best prospect to someone else.
And you are amazing and awesome. If you don’t know it yet maybe that is why God brought network marketing into your life.
I had to learn how much I had to offer by going through the struggle of inviting people who wanted nothing to do with what I was pitching – selling.
That is a story for another day. Today I want to sell you on the power of “let’s”.
He is very social and wants in and out of the house so that he can bark at people passing by.
Max lets me know he wants out by scratching on the door.
The thing is he doesn’t always go out when I get up and open the door. I stand there with the door open and he sits looking at me.
I close the door and go sit down.
You guessed it, he soon scratches on the door. I go open the door and he sits looking at me. I close the door and go sit down.
Max has heard the phrase, “Rinse and repeat.” He scratches. I open the door. He sits.
So, you will figure out that I am a slow learner when I tell you that I eventually – we are talking months – thought to say as I stood by the open door, “Okay, Max, let’s go outside.”
Voila, Max rushed out the door, stopped a few feet out and looked back at me as if to say, “Well, are you coming?”
Yes, Max wants to go with me. He doesn’t want to go outside alone. He is social and wants company.
Your friends are social.
They don’t want to do network marketing. They may not be driven to make money.
But they do want to do things with you.
Listen to your friends. Learn what they want. Then say, let’s do that together.
For instance, you hear your friend talking about wanting to quit her job and stay home with her kids. Let her know that you are listening by not offering suggestions too soon.
Ask a question that will help her give you more information.
Then let her know what you hear her saying and suggest what you would like to help her with.
Be aware of your motivation. Network marketing isn’t for everyone.
But if you have listened well you can say something like:
“It sounds like you are determined to make some changes in your life. You have my support. I am working towards that goal too. How about I share with you how that looks for me. Then let’s work together to fire our bosses.”
“You seem to be willing to work really hard to stay at home with your kids. You might just be a good candidate for what I am doing. Let’s look at it and see.”
You get the idea.
You will also agree that we need to be better listeners, right?
So, let’s learn together.
Have you been reading my blog series on Five Listening Skills?
With these skills, you will be an effective listener. You will discern what your friend wants and therefore how you can support her in achieving that.
I am working on the fifth Listening Skill, Confident Close. Then I will have a post that explores how to put the Five Listening Skills together both offline and online.
As you read these blogs you may wish that you can practice them with others who are on the same page. You probably will have questions. Others will also.
These webinars will be excellent training tools so that you can duplicate on your team.
Email me if you want to be part of this project. I will be selling the webinars to other but for those who join me live, I will give them license to use them as training for their teams.
God bless you,
Today Max and I walked past a neighbor who asked, “Who’s walking who?”
“Oh definitely, Max is taking me for a walk!”
It is true. Max pulls me along. It is a good thing he is not a big dog breed or I’d be in trouble.
I’m not complaining though. He keeps me moving at a healthy pace. Max even keeps me walking every day – even on the days that I don’t want to walk.
After our brief conversation with the neighbor, Max and I kept walking. I got to thinking how true it was that Max was responsible for my walking every day. In fact, it was one of the reasons I justified getting a dog. I knew that I would need to walk a dog; and even more, I knew I needed to walk.
Max has been a better motivator to get me active than any of the various fitness machines and devices I have purchased. Some were as good as new when I sold them. I still have the last two that I bought. One is buried under boxes. The other sits in the living room practically unnoticed, certainly unused.
The difference with Max as an exercise device is that Max demands attention. On days when weather or my schedule cancel his walk, Max gets scrappy. I have learned to make time for a walk.
In other words, Max has become my “why” for walking.
A “why” – a reason for doing what you find scary, hard, impossible.
Is it to take dream vacations? Or buy a dream house?
Is it to send your children to college? Or to bring your husband home from the corporate job?
Is it to just be able to pay the bills?
It had better be something compelling.
It needs to be something that will haunt you like Max haunts me if he doesn’t get his walk.
It should be something that makes you lie awake because you didn’t make your calls.
On the cold winter mornings, I take Max for a walk because I know that he will not leave me alone if he doesn’t get his walk.
I heard that dogs don’t really care how long their walk is. It is true of Max. On the days that I am short of time, our walk may only be half a block. Max is good.
I really need more of a walk for maintaining my physical well being; but I have, at least, maintained my habit of daily walks. Most of our walks are longer; maybe I have gone a block and think we could start back; but I push forward.
My habit is to get even a short walk in while striving for a longer walk.
You need to have a daily minimum while maintaining a higher standard on a typical day.
Years ago I attended a Bible conference. The speaker challenged us to commit to reading the Bible for at least five minutes a day.
Was the speaker saying that five minutes a day is enough time in the Bible? I didn’t think that at all when I made the commitment. I realized that five minutes a day established a routine and a daily minimum. Most days I spend more than five minutes, but the minimum five minutes keeps me from getting out of the habit of reading the Bible daily.
It is all pretty simple. Yet so vital. I did not walk regularly until I got Max. Max has become both my “why” and my accountability partner. He is a faithful motivator. I hope and pray that you find one as effective. You won’t find one more adorable.
Max’s dog food has many colors. There are bright colors and bland colors. Max picks through the food and eats the colored bits first.
Max will eat all of his dog food – eventually; but he picks out certain colors first. I suppose he is picking certain flavors.
After the food has been in his dish for an hour or so, Max has picked out most of the reds, greens and yellows.
I don’t really care because he will eventually eat it all.
Of course, he won’t eat dried dog food as long as there is real meat available.
Max’s eating habits reminds me of the conversations network marketers have about who to recruit.
I confess, there have been times when I would have signed anyone up.
Then there have been times when I might have not been open enough.
We had this discussion with one of our up line when he was training our team.
I said, “There are some people I just couldn’t work with.” His response was, “That is what your up line is for.”
He went on to explain that when you are starting out, you can’t afford to be picky. Sign up everyone and then help them find the right person to help them get going.
You can do that if you are with a company that encourages an atmosphere of support throughout the company. Then you can work with cross line.
And, by the way, I think that even if you would love working with your new distributor, you need to help them find the person who will be the best fit for them. As network marketing evolves, it is clear that there is more than one way to build an organization. What works for you may not work for your sister or best friends. What works for your up line may not work for you. So make it a habit to introduce your new recruits to different folks on your team and in your company. Let them know that it is their business and they get to build it in the way that works best for them.
The point of being picky is that individuals that you invite to associate with you and your business should complement your business not detract from it.
What do I mean? Well let me illustrate with two lists. One list is those who you should be inviting. The other is a list of people that you maybe should leave off of your list.
Your list or database is your inventory. If it isn’t long you will be out of business soon. So keep it growing.
Building a business is hard enough without the baggage some people have. Certainly, there are heart warming stories of network marketing transforming people; you may want to cut someone slack if you see a diamond in the rough. Just keep in mind that you are the one who will have to work with them through the process.
At the end of the day, Max’s bowl in almost empty. I fill it back up and the process starts over.
There is an endless list of people in the world. You just need to keep meeting them. Care more about what they need than you need and you will connect with them. The bonus is that most people will return the favor and care about what you care about.
At the end of the day, Max has eaten a health diet. He chooses which bits of dog food he wants to eat first.
You can do the same. Talk to people you are most comfortable with first. Or not. What matters is that you keep talking to new people every day. Don’t quit until you have all you need.
Max is a small dog. He only weighs 11 pounds. He definitely feels his limitations.
One of the things he doesn’t think he can do is push doors open.
This is him earlier today. I had gone outside and he followed me but I had left the door partially closed and he felt stuck.
Max has struggled with doors for all three years of his life.
It has created funny situations.
For instance, I sometimes realize that I haven’t seen Max for a while and I wonder where he is. That is, I used to wonder where he was. Now I know to go back to my bathroom and let him out.
Max can push the door to get in; but he doesn’t think he can push it open to get out. Strangely, he keeps going back to my bathroom, even though he ends up being stuck.
So I have started working to teach him to open the door.
Today, I went outside; but left the door partially open. He wistfully looked out the door at me but didn’t even try to push the door open. I encouraged him to come outside with me. He stayed put, unwilling to try to open the door.
Basically, he refused to leave his comfort zone, even though it limited where he could go.
And after several tries and lots of encouragement from me, Max finally opened the door a little bit more and came out!
What action, that is vital to your business, do you stop at the threshold of success?
Do you have a hard time picking up the phone and inviting a friend to join you as a customer or distributor?
Is speaking to a group of people enough to make you lose your voice?
How about talking with the server at you favorite restaurant?
All of the above?
It isn’t enough to help most of us. You can see the truth of the idea that stepping out of your comfort zone is holding you back and still be bound by fear.
What do you think about this drawing?
Can you pick just one of the concepts outside of your comfort zone and do something?
It is hard to do because many of the concepts outside of the circle are abstract. You need specific items to act on. You need doable action items.
How about this drawing?
Is there one thing outside of your comfort zone that you can do?
Of course, these are just examples. You should pick our own items.
Make a list of every specific task that you should do but aren’t doing because of fear or lack of confidence or lack of ability.
You can pick the one least threatening to your comfort. The point is that when you do something outside of your comfort zone you will grow. You will grow in confidence and in skill. You will feel empowered to do another.
Or you can pick the one most threatening to your comfort. By choosing one you are eliminating the others and you lower the combined fear factor. If you tackle the most threatening task imagine how much more confidence you gain for taking on the remaining tasks.
The key to stepping out of your comfort zone is to take one step. And then another step.
What do you need to take that step? Do you need more training? Do you need a mentor to coach you? Do you need to just do it?
Choose the step you need to take out of your comfort zone.
Decide what you need to successfully take that step.
Then take that step.
There will always be actions that make you feel uncomfortable. But as you take one step at a time you will grow in the discipline of stepping out of the comfort zone.
You will be amazed at what you can do. You will love what you do. You will never want to go back to safe and scared again.
After I challenged him to do something he didn’t think he could do, he did it and was rewarded with being outside.
To take the picture, I had to stage the event. This time Max didn’t make it outside. We’ll keep trying. Max needs a coach – me – to help him. Eventually, Max will learn that he can open doors way bigger than he is.
In the meantime, today he got a doggie treat after he tried and failed.
I had no good experience with dog training. Not that I wanted Max to perform dog tricks. I just wanted him to behave.
He wasn’t used to a leash. He stole my favorite pen and chewed it. He chewed the end of a phone charging cord. He went through the trash and trashed the room.
We fixed the leash problem by using a leash. He still isn’t perfect in that he pulls me along at a good healthy pace. But since that is what I need, I haven’t tried to fix that. Until Max becomes the big dog he thinks he is, we’re good.
The favorite pen stealing was cute. I laughed and chased him. It was a great game. Then I realized that I was actually rewarding bad behavior. So I gained a new command – “Drop it.”
When Max grabbed a pen, I sternly said “Drop it.” Nothing happened. So I gained a new strategy – The spray bottle.
When Max grabbed a pen, I sternly said “Drop it,” and gave him a shot from the spray bottle. Max dropped the pen. I had gained a new skill – dog training.
I realized three things from that:
Max is not perfectly trained. But he mostly behaves. Which is what Mom and I want.
I play with Max to make up for the lost pen game. He is happy and content. How could he not? He has two women’s laps to cuddle in. One of them gives him cookie bites even though I have sternly forbidden it. (My mother does not obey me like Max does. But then I have never tried the spray bottle with her.)
One, and the most important, is how he responds to his relationship with Mom and me.
He is always so excited to see us.
His tale wags his body, literally, he is so excited.
I am challenged when I see that because I think that I need to be more excited about my relationship with God. But then I think I will be beyond excitement when I finally am at home with my Father.
So I am realizing that Max demonstrates why you need a coach. I know that I have grown from having coaches involved in my business growth.
Thanks to Max, you can understand that you need a coach for a least three reasons. Here they are:
Max demonstrates this need often. He is short and jumping up into our laps is a big jump for him. But Max can and does jump that high.
The recliner that is sitting next to the window Max perches on is a big jump for him. I have seen Max not only make the jump but hit the jump so fast that he has rocked the chair back.
So it is well established that Max can jump up.
Yet, mysteriously, sometimes he does not know that he can jump up. The chair or our lap looks to high and he tries and tries without success.
That is when Max needs a coach. We tell him he can do it and encourage him to jump. Eventually, he does and is successful.
People aren’t much different. We need someone to come along side us and remind us that we can do this.
If you are building a network marketing business for the first time, you really need a coach/cheerleader.
One day you believe that you can rank advance and then the next day you believe that you will never do it.
But you are venturing where you have never gone before. At least, you should be. If you aren’t stepping out of your comfort zone then you aren’t going far enough.
That can and should be scary. And although Eleanor Roosevelt advised that you try something scary everyday, she didn’t insist that you do it alone.
You need a coach. Someone who believes in you and is committed to your success. Someone who will even get in your face if you need it.
A coach has tasted of the success you are seeking. She helps you determine what it is that you want. He helps you formulate a plan to get what you want.
Max loves to go for a walk.
He knows when it is time with for a walk and he follows me, jumping and running back and forth. He is excited.
When I get the leash and am ready to connect Max to his leash, he goes crazy. He grabs a toy and shakes it, he grabs a mouth of dry dog food and chews furiously.
I call him to come to me and he gets more crazy.
I have to say his name, tell him to come to me and point to the stop where he needs to come. I often have to repeat that.
Max wants to go for a walk but he needs me to help him focus on doing what he has to do, so that he can go for a walk.
You sometimes get so excited about a new comp plan or product or contact, that you forget to focus on the plan you set for yourself. You lose valuable time and sometimes even that new person you were sure would sign up with you.
You need a coach. A coach stays focused. A coach keeps you focused.
Of course, you need a coach who is connected, someone who will be available when you aren’t focused. No one person can do that.
So you need a coach connection. You need a coach who will keep you connected with a community, a team that will keep you focused.
You need a connection that contains successful individuals you can pattern yourself and your business after.
You need to increase your connection with folks who are doing what you want to do, successfully.
Max was nearly perfect when he came to us. You are great as you are.
When Max came to us he was undisciplined and in need of a home. Max needed to be surrounded by a family that loved him. Mom and I needed someone to love.
We helped him be just disciplined enough to get along with us and other people.
You need a coach if you are going to grow.
A coach is one aspect of personal development.
Books and seminars are great. You definitely need to be doing that for personal development.
But all the truly successful people got where they are with a coach. Most of them are still letting a coach challenge them to grow.
Fortunately, there are lots of coaches available. Some call themselves coaches. Some don’t.
It is your job to find the right one for you.
Here are places to consider a coach:
You are an entrepreneur. That is a high calling. You have the potential to touch other lives with your greatness.
It will not come easily. It will be hard.
Be prepared to be different.
Be prepared to sacrifice.
Be prepared to lead.
Of course, that is a tall order. What does all attitude look like? How can you make that work for you? Let me share what I observe in Max with ideas for you to Max-imize your business.
Max isn’t complicated. He knows what he wants. It is simple. He wants human food and human attention. He makes his presence known until he gets what he wants. Then he takes a nap and recharges. Max naps a lot. I think he dreams about what he wants when he sleeps. I hear little yips come from him sometimes while he is sleeping.
What Max wants is clearly defined.
Have you clearly defined what it is you want?
You know the cliche.
If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail. Benjamin Franklin
For years I failed to plan and set goals, because I didn’t have a good tool or a coach to help me.
And I didn’t see the absolute need for a plan and goals. I had to get to that place.
It is a process.
We don’t start network marketing as a perfect network marketer. We grow into that.
Maybe today you have clearly defined goals and a plan to achieve them. You are on your way to Max-mizing your business.
If not, find a coach (your up line is an obvious option.)
Sometimes up line are not an option. Maybe they are as new to this as you are. Or they aren’t available for whatever reason.
The internet has many resources for you. You obviously have started looking there if you are reading this. Keep looking until you find what works for you.
You should know that I have a great tool you might want to check out. I will be offering five coaching slots in May. Message me if you would like to chat about whether that would be a good fit for you.
When Max wants to cuddle in our lap he begins by sitting in front of us with his intense stare. (Check it out in the photo above.) If we miss that cue, Max puts his feet up, either on our knee or the furniture we are sitting on. Then he shakes his 11 pound body in such a way that we know that he means business. I am positive that it registers on the seismograph in Golden, Colorado.
I have been guilty of ignoring those signs when I am writing a blog. (I know what I want too.)
If that happens, Max barks a short, high pitched sound and then throws his head to the side. I am not sure what that is really about; but it is disarming. I can’t be irritated with his insistence because he is so adorable.
Max is persistent; and Max is disarming in his persistence. It comes natural to Max and some people.
Read Andrew Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People. This is the best manual on getting what you want in a disarming way. Get it on Kindle, Audible or the book.
Again, the internet is a great source. Many successful network marketers have turned to using the internet to reach people and have documented their success so that you and I can duplicate it. Here is a link to the one that has been most helpful for me. Julie Burke will train you how to use Facebook to recruit. You can even train your team to do the same.
When Max wants up on my lap, I might as well set my work aside; because Max is not quitting.
Even when I am focused on the computer, Max believes that his wishes are supreme. He just continues to make me aware of him.
Max is persistent and adorable.
You have to continue to reach out to people with your business and be attractive. You and I will never be adorable like our furry friends. We have to find our own way of being attractive.
You have to be yourself. You have to be confident in yourself.
The best way to do that is by using power poses. Amy Cuddy is the expert on power poses. Here is one of her TED Talks.
I feel a little like Max right now. I want to stare intensely at you and tell you that you can do this. Your search will be fruitful if you learn to Max-imize your business.
I hope that my blog has been helpful for you. If it hasn’t, keep looking. Don’t give up on your dreams or yourself.
Max and I believe in you.
What do you think, can we learn from a Chihuahua with attitude?
I didn’t plan on him being a comfort to us. It just happened that way.
I remember the overwhelming desire to find a dog after Rich died. It didn’t seem like a good time but I kept looking up dog rescue sites in our area. I could not help myself!
Max was rescued from the Walmart Garden Center. Unbelievably, someone let him go.
He is mostly a chihuahua. The vet said he probably has a little pug in him. When he wants outside he jumps up and down at the door like he is a jack russell terrier. Outside he runs circles as if he thinks he is a greyhound. And when there is a big dog around he acts like he is the biggest, baddest dog there ever was.
Max is a bit bossy and high maintenance. He gets away with that because he is all attitude and totally adorable.
He provides comic relief. One evening I was holding him just before I put him to bed. He was making me laugh. Suddenly, I remembered my son and started crying.
Max immediately quit his funny antics and sat still, listening to me. He was more compassionate than some humans.
We hadn’t even held him. But after we got home, my mom asked me, “Now why didn’t we get that little dog?”
After the third time, I asked her if she wanted to get that little dog. She said she did if I did. I told her I did indeed want that little dog who after just a few minutes viewing had already found his way to my heart.
There was no other name for a dog with that kind of impact than Max.
So Max came home to help my mom and I grieve the loss of her grandson and my son.
But Max is teaching me so much about relationships and incredibly how to succeed in life and business.
This is the first of several blogs on how to Max-imize your business.
In the meantime, look around you. Do you have a furry friend? I’ll bet if you consider how they approach you and life, there are lessons that they are teaching.
Will you comment below on what they are teaching you?