Two People You Need to Succeed

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And can they be the same person?

One is an expert who trains another who is learning or improving a skill.

The other is an experienced and trusted adviser.

The coach and the mentor.

And they can be the same person.

Here are a few thoughts I have gleaned from the “all knowing” internet and some thoughts of my own.

Coaching is…
“a process that enables learning and development to occur and thus performance to improve. To be a successful a Coach requires a knowledge and understanding of process as well as the variety of styles, skills and techniques that are appropriate to the context in which the coaching takes place”

Eric Parsloe, The Manager as Coach and Mentor (1999) page 8. Eric is a respected author and Director of the OCM

Mentoring is…
“off-line help by one person to another in making significant transitions in knowledge, work or thinking”

Clutterbuck, D & Megginson, D, Mentoring Executives and Directors (1999) page 3. David Clutterbuck & David Megginson are both founder members of The European Mentoring and Coaching Council and highly respected authors, academics and consultants in the mentoring arena.

Mentoring is a long-term process based on mutual trust and respect. Coaching, on the other hand, is for a short period of time. Mentoring is more focused on creating an informal association between the mentor and mentee, whereas coaching follows a more structured and formal approach.

June 7, 2016
What is the Difference Between a Mentor and Coach? – Small …

Those are interesting ideas regarding a coach and a mentor.

In my experience both are necessary for growth – personal or otherwise.

And it is not always easy to find such people to engage in your growth.

As I look back over my experience with individuals who fulfilled one or the other role, here are some of my conclusions:

A coach must be:

Knowledgeable about the skill you are learning and growing in.

They don’t need to be the best at what you are learning but they must be masterful at understanding what it will take for you to succeed.

John Wooden is one of the most successful coaches in sports. And although he was a good student athlete his real success was as a coach. And when he was coaching he certainly wasn’t the best basketball player.

Coach Wooden was masterful in recognizing his player’s strong points and using them together as a team.

Which suggests that a good coach must be:

Skillful at recognizing your strengths and helping you maximize them.

Most of us are not good at acknowledging our strengths. We have a self defeating understanding that to acknowledge our strengths is pride.

So we end up focusing on our weaknesses. That does not help our belief and self confidence.

A good coach will direct us to build up our strengths which often counter the weaknesses.

As you see yourself as a decisive action taker, you no longer look at yourself as a procastinator.

As you see yourself growing in speaking skills, you no longer think of yourself as a timid introvert.

And a coach must give you a game plan to follow.

Coaches in football have a big decision at half time. Do they stick with the game plan or devise a new one?

Championships have been won or lost based upon The Game Plan.

Your coach must be able to give you a plan or a road map to follow on your journey to business success.

Your coach must be able to help you analyze at “half time” (monthly, quarterly, or yearly) how your game plan is working and whether you should stick with the game plan or devise a new one.

All too often, I believe, we don’t stick with the game plan long enough.

A coach can help us with that but having a mentor as well would be helpful.

A mentor is a good sounding board and may not be an expert on the skill you are learning.

A good mentor listens to you and asks the questions that help you to go deeper into your own thoughts and ideas.

In my experience, people are more than capable of making their own decisions than we give them credit.

What they need is someone who listens and asks helpful questions.

That is a skill that a good mentor will have and when you find someone like that you will be blessed.

A good mentor will be above the confusion that we sometimes experience.

I lived in a small town in the foothills of Colorado. I could look out over the plains for hundreds of miles. Often I saw a blanket of clouds on the prairie while the sun shined on me.

I knew that those living out on the plains did not see the sun. All they could see was fog or cloud cover. Eventually, the Colorado sun would burn off those clouds and the people below would see the same sun I saw.

When we are stuck with a problem in the process of learning a skill we feel like we will never get it. A mentor isn’t stuck in that process and can encourage us that we will see it too.

But sometimes a good mentor will confront and hold us accountable.

A good mentor is someone who you trust with your long term goals.

And they will remind you of those goals when your actions seem to be working against those goals.

Suppose I have started a new weight loss plan and have committed to a healthy diet and exercise plan for the next six months.

My mentor and I have talked about how it will be hard but that I have a realistic plan that should bring results – if I am faithful to the plan.

I have shared with my mentor that I want to improve my blood pressure and cholesterol levels because my mother died of heart disease when I was young. I want to be there for my own children.

But after a month of being faithful to the plan I get discouraged and start “cheating.”

My mentor sternly but gently asks if I still want to be there for my children.

That question leads to a conversation about why I hadn’t kept to the plan.

We decide it was too rigid and I allow for little “cheats” and I recommit to the plan thanks to a mentor that cared enough to confront.

I know how valuable mentors and coaches are because I have found a team of them.

Yes, a whole team of mentors and coaches.

One of those is Ferny Ceballos. Ferny is a terrific example of a mentor and coach.

He knows my reasons for building a business online and holds me accountable to a game plan.

He has provided that game plan.

And I can introduce you to him if you are interested.

Just click on this link and you will be signed up for a free Attraction Marketing boot camp with Ferny.

You’ll receive by email videos from my mentor/coach and you will have a choice to watch them or not.

If you like I will be your mentor/accountability partner to encourage you to watch them. Message me here to let me know you want me to check in with you.

When you sign up for the Attraction Marketing boot camp you will also get another offer. When you take advantage of that offer you will have an opportunity for a coaching call.

If you don’t have a good coach and mentor you really should click on the link and get started.

I hope this has been helpful for you. If it has feel free to share it with your friends and team. And I’ll be in touch.

Connie Suarez

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